How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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