i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
only if we run a train.
done.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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