He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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