We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
