we're blogging at a bar
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time