I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.