Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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