Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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