I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I'm just crazy horny about you
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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