I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
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Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
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I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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