Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
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