The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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