and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
