yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize