As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
