I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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