you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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