Will you blow on my dice?
you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
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