he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
