splinters make it hard to masturbate
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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