people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
