We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
