Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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