I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
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