why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
