That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
not ubering you a puppy
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize