Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I'm gonna have a badass scar
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
