Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
