'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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