At least make sure they are 18
Why
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
