I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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