I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize
