you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Randomize
