As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
