Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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