Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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