I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
