the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Randomize
