I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Well I just put wine in my tea
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
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