If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
