My sheets look like a crime scene.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize