idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize