as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
