He asked me if I "almost moaned"
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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