its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
