I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
