So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
The feeling are messing with the penis
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
