Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
she pinky promised me she was 18
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
