PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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