is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
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