what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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