didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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